Posts tagged tw: abuse
Love From the Linden Trees
This is my awesome tagline
50 Shades of Abuse Flyer - Canada
Use, redistribute, print.
Click image and magnify for large version.
Okay. I understood all the flack Twilight got for being an abusive relationship. Because it was and it was being read by a very young and impressionable audience. But ffs, 50 Shades is an ADULT NOVEL. Iit is about a BDSM couple. Which - newsflash - do exist. It is a completely consensual form of dominate/submissive sex play. The whole concept of domestic violence and abuse is that one side exerts control over an unwilling victim. I don’t recall Anastasia, or whatever she’s called, protesting to Christian’s form of sex. If I remember correctly, she quite enjoyed it! So before you condemn a work of romanticized fiction, actually consider it’s audience and remember that they are mature and capable enough to know the difference between reality and fiction.
so i guess you didn’t read the parts where he coerces her and the part where he continues after she has used her safeword and acts like a fucking creep whenever they aren’t having sex
it is the worst possible introduction to BDSM i could imagine
i know my shit okay
im hoping the people defending this book are 1. never getting into BDSM 2. not currently into BDSM 3. havent read the book bc i dont want to believe anyone is that fucking stupid
Let me
just
fucking
drop
some fucking
knowledge on you right now.
Wanna know the BDSM mantra? Safe, sane, consensual.
So let me explain why this book was devoid of all three of these things.
Safe - In the first few chapters of the novel, Christian Grey tracks Ana’s cell phone to find her at a club. Takes her home when she’s drunk, changes her when she’s so intoxicated she doesn’t remember him doing so,and informs her he will be keeping tabs on her for her own benefit. This is not the behaviour of a respectable Dominant. This is the behaviour of a power hungry, abusive asshole who really can’t take no for an answer.
Sane - One of the most important parts of BDSM is aftercare. Scenes can be extremely traumatizing and intense for the submissive. Aftercare is anything from petting to cuddling to holding to sweet talking, whatever degree of gentleness a bottom would need to pull them out of “subspace”. How does Christian provide aftercare? He submits Ana to a traumatizing first time spanking experience AND THEN FUCKING LEAVES. AND GETS MAD THAT SHE DIDN’T TELL HIM SHE WAS UPSET. He’s the one who should fucking know better! That, again, is not the act of a responsible Dominant. It’s the act of a selfish abuser.
Consensual - Did I mention he undressed her when she was belligerently drunk? Tracked her phone to locate her? He also buys her a new car despite her saying no countless times. Now, consent is important for any kind of sexual activity at all. Consent means informed, consent means enthusiastic. Informed, enthusiastic consent. This is crucial in a BDSM setting. Scenes can be extremely intense, especially for the bottom. What is Christian’s form of obtaining consent? Handing Ana a fucking contract highlighting all the things he wants to do her asshole and asking her to sign it. She was a virgin (Don’t even get me fucking started.) who had never before been exposed to BDSM. Entering in that kind of relationship takes a gargantuan amount of trust and knowledge so you know exactly what you’re getting into. Not reading a list of kinks on a piece of paper and signing your rights to say no away. Christian didn’t offer her resources, he didn’t offer her information. He gave her an ultimatum. That is not the sort of consent a responsible Dom/me would seek from their submissive.
Fuck. This. book. It’s written in a shitty way, it’s a terrible example of a BDSM relationship (ask anybody already involved in the lifestyle and watch them go blue in the face just thinking about it), which is already faced with enough prejudice and misunderstand, and it romanticizes and glorifies abuse.
^I’m just going to stand up for this and clap
^^
(via all-about-male-privilege)
Is it weird that I take Jennifer Lopez’s Dance Again as learning how to live again and enjoy it after having been in an abusive relationship?
ohmister writes:
I just wanted to make a point about something that you said to an ask, that most men “don’t want to work with feminists to change custody laws.”
I just wanted to point out that we don’t NEED to change custody laws. Exaggerated complaints by men aside, actual studies show that when men actually want custody, they overwhelmingly get it. Even if they abuse their wife. Even if they abuse their child(ren). Even if they’re alcoholics or drug addicts or only want custody to spite and hurt their ex.
So uh, yeah, dudes, tell me again how child custody is skewed in favor of the mother?
Wow. Holy damn wow. Thanks for pointing that out. I am even more hardcore side-eyeing the absolute HELL out of MRAs atm.
(via wearenotgods)
Celebrities (other than Chris Brown) who have committed violence against women
In 1988, Sean Penn tied then-wife Madonna to a chair and beat her with a baseball bat.
Charlie Sheen was arrested for violently assaulting adult film actress Capri Anderson.
Roman Polanski raped of a 13-year-old girl before fleeing the country.
Michael Fassbender was charged in 2010 with beating an ex-girlfriend.
Gary Oldman hit ex-wife Donya Fiorentino repeatedly about the face with a telephone receiver in front of their two children.
Sean Connery thinks an openhanded slap is justified if a woman is a “bitch, or hysterical, or bloody-minded.”
Feel free to add to the list.
additions from the notes:
Josh Brolin was arrested for abusing Diane Lane in 2004.
Glen Campbell beat Tanya Tucker and on one occasion knocked her teeth out. Glen actually received a tribute at the 2012 Grammy Awards—the same year that Chris Brown received so much vitriol for performing.
Jonathan Rhys Meyers was arrested in 2005 after he was accused of beating up his teenage girlfriend and throwing a cellphone at her. The 27-year-old actor later made a counter allegation that the 18-year-old girlfriend had assaulted him. The warring couple were both questioned at a London police station before being released on bail. He was also verbally abusive and threatening to a woman who tried to help him up off the floor during one of his drunken airport episodes. “Don’t you know who I am?” Yes dear, you’re the King of fucking England.
Harry Morgan, best known for his role as Col. Sherman Potter in the television series “MASH,” was accused in July 1996 of beating his wife.
Sean Bean has been arrested for harassing an ex girlfriend and has been reported for domestic assault.
Tommy Lee pleaded no contest in April 1998 to a felony charge of spousal battery against his wife, former “Baywatch” star Pamela Anderson. Lee received a three-year suspended prison sentence, was required to spend 180 days in jail and ordered to pay a total of $6,200 to a shelter for battered women. Anderson, who filed for divorce shortly after the incident, reportedly had hoped her husband would be spared jail time.
(via blue-jayne)
If Kristen Stewart can lose her job, risk losing her entire career, fanbase, and respect over cheating on her boyfriend, the fact that Chris Brown is still acknowledged and celebrated is a fucking crime. If you want a prime example of women’s inequality in the media, there it is.
Right, no.
Michael Fassbender
Charlie Sheen
Sean Penn
Etc
Amen
(via dopesickles)
stupendous-operatic-spectacle:
stupendous-operatic-spectacle:
I basically only liked it for the potential for the stuff I like in fic because it seems like the perfect recipe for mutual bite-y i-hate-you-i-want-you angry fucking. And then that never showed up ever and ugh. Ruined.
Yeah there was all that stuff but I was basically ruined as soon as he said he’d cry like a girly girl. I got little Scott McCall heart eyes and never looked back. And I ship/ped them so hard. My beautiful dimpled babies.
I love crackships! Although I cannot get behind Derek/anyone teenage. I was okay with it until he ‘seduced’ Erica and it was so creepy and I realized they’re all teenagers and he’s a grownup and ew. I am too old to get behind that. But most of the other ones I just adore.
Ugh, Scott/Isaac. Proof that fandom can ruin anything for me. I shipped that from 2.02 on and now I’m pissed at everyone because all the fic is terrible and the tropes are gross too.
I remember when he showed up on TVD and I nearly swooned with delight. It’s a pity he’s not a regular character instead of that Klaus dude.
Lol, that was a great moment.
See, I started shipping most of that back when the only thing i saw with his age had it listed as 19. Which wouldn’t have been so weird.
There’s still 1 or 2 fics i like from that ship, but yeah. Too much exploitation of Isaac as abused.
Lol, i have only watched the 1st season of that show, and hearing about how they’ve been playing up Damon as great and fucking over Bonnie I have very little desire to continue watching.
Yeah that’s true. I would definitely not have a problem with it then. But now they’re supposedly making him even older and I’m probably gonna have a ragestroke when fandom still defends Sterek.
I’ve complained about that more than once. And how unrealistic and over the top they make his abuse. I read one where he had new broken bones every week!
I quit at the end of season two and from what I’ve seen from everyone else I made a really good life choice.
Ugh, really? I mean, Hoechlin is 25 or so, so maybe they’ll just make him his actual age?
Yikes, never found anything that bad. But yeah, we don’t know how bad it was exactly, but that’s over the top.
It certainly sounds like it.
As far as I know right now Derek is 23 or 24 so older would most likely be my age. (27) And since fandom reacted… badly, to me pointing out how sketchy it is NOW I can’t imagine they won’t be disgusting as shit about him being 10 years older while Stiles is still very much underage.
For once thing generally once there are more then one broken bone the state steps in. Quite frankly I think there was a lot more emotional and phsychological abuse.
I’ve gotten to the point where I am very unlikely to keep watching a show out of persistance once it pisses me off on a regular basis.
stupendous-operatic-spectacle:
I basically only liked it for the potential for the stuff I like in fic because it seems like the perfect recipe for mutual bite-y i-hate-you-i-want-you angry fucking. And then that never showed up ever and ugh. Ruined.
Yeah there was all that stuff but I was basically ruined as soon as he said he’d cry like a girly girl. I got little Scott McCall heart eyes and never looked back. And I ship/ped them so hard. My beautiful dimpled babies.
I love crackships! Although I cannot get behind Derek/anyone teenage. I was okay with it until he ‘seduced’ Erica and it was so creepy and I realized they’re all teenagers and he’s a grownup and ew. I am too old to get behind that. But most of the other ones I just adore.
Ugh, Scott/Isaac. Proof that fandom can ruin anything for me. I shipped that from 2.02 on and now I’m pissed at everyone because all the fic is terrible and the tropes are gross too.
I remember when he showed up on TVD and I nearly swooned with delight. It’s a pity he’s not a regular character instead of that Klaus dude.
Lol, that was a great moment.
See, I started shipping most of that back when the only thing i saw with his age had it listed as 19. Which wouldn’t have been so weird.
There’s still 1 or 2 fics i like from that ship, but yeah. Too much exploitation of Isaac as abused.
Lol, i have only watched the 1st season of that show, and hearing about how they’ve been playing up Damon as great and fucking over Bonnie I have very little desire to continue watching.
Yeah that’s true. I would definitely not have a problem with it then. But now they’re supposedly making him even older and I’m probably gonna have a ragestroke when fandom still defends Sterek.
I’ve complained about that more than once. And how unrealistic and over the top they make his abuse. I read one where he had new broken bones every week!
I quit at the end of season two and from what I’ve seen from everyone else I made a really good life choice.
Anonymous asked:
Biggest pet peeve in Scott/Isaac fics
That’s I’m scared to read them because surprise!Sterek.
My actual legit problem with the ones I’ve read? They make Isaac’s abuse implausible. It was the main problem with any Isaac fic I read. He’d have new broken bones every week and things like that.
A review of Chris Brown’s new album. Choice tidbits include: “…a 19 track repugnant record we can only hope will be his last.” “… a catastrophic clusterfuck of an album” “…and for those of you who say you need to separate the music from the man; screw you.” and finally, “NO STARS FOREVER.”
Printed in X-Press Magazine based out of Perth, Australia.
Did they do this for Fassbender’s films too?
(via karnythia)
Not A Cliche
Rated: T
Characters: Isaac, Derek, Erica
Summary: Isaac doesn’t want to be a stereotype of an abused child. But he can’t change the fact that he was an abused child.
What is the urge to make everything worse for the dorkpack?
Isaac constantly getting bones broken.
In this fic Erica had cancer twice and appendicitis and Boyd was left locked in a classroom accidentally and broke through a glass window.
Omfg, “I was lucky if I could go a whole week without a broken bone” ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THIS SHIT YOU CAN’T BREAK YOUR KID’S BONES ON A WEEKLY BASIS AND KEEP THEM.
[tw: abuse]
Okay, I wish I would NEVER have to make a post like this.. but here it is.
That’s Emily, a girl I’ve known for about 10 years. That’s her face a couple of days after her boyfriend beat the shit out of her. She has to get facial surgery for broken bones, a titanium plate inserted for her “pulverized cheekbones”.
She has been amazingly open about her experience and very optimistic, retaining her sense of humour, but her ex-boyfriend hasn’t been caught yet. He beat her in Arizona but he might be out of the state by now.
His name is Chris Young. He’s a raver and a DJ. I’m not friends with him on facebook, so I can’t get any better pictures than that. But you can see that she trusted him. And he broke that trust in trying to break her.
If you see him, please call the Tucson Police. IF you know ANYTHING about him, call the police.
It’d be great if people could reblog this for her.
That’s bullshit. This guy is a fucking terrible person.
SIGNAL BOOST. Somebody get this scumbag.
Emily- you are beautiful. So beautiful.
if you see this man
chop his fucking junk off
(Source: knotateenwolfblog, via popular-slut-club-deactivated20)
OK, here I go.
It’s only been about half an hour and I’m already tired of seeing people belittling Scott because of his hallucination.
I’m not sure if you’ve read the On Fire novel, but it gives us two very good scenes in regards to Scott’s parents and their relationships. Before the book, we only knew that Melissa had said they were better off without him.
So this is why they’re better off without him (tw: emotional abuse)
A few booths down, Scott McCall put down the cheeseburger from his kiddie meal. “I’m not hungry,” he said miserably. He wanted to get away from the arguing. His parents always fought a lot, but today it was worse. Something had happened. Something bad. “Can I have money for video games?”
“No,” his father snapped, as his mom opened her purse. “We don’t have enough money for crap like that. Am I right, Melissa?”
“I have a couple of quarters,” Scott’s mom said, ignoring his father. And somehow, even though he was only ten years old, he knew it would be better to take them than to explain to her that there was only one game in the entire Beaconburger that took less than a dollar. And that it was a stupid game, and he didn’t like to play it.
He held out his hand for her to drop the quarters in, but his dad clamped his fingers around Scott’s wrist. It hurt, but he pretended that it didn’t as he watched his mom looking through her purse.
Then Scott felt his chest go tight, and a crackle of distress snapped through him. It was starting. He was going to have an asthma attack. Here. Now.
In front of his father.
“I’m getting mixed messages,” his father said to his mom, who looked up from her purse and saw that his dad had hold of Scott’s wrist. “First we don’t have enough money to pay for cable. But we have enough money for Scott’s inhaler. We don’t have enough money for a down payment on a new car but we can stop in here at the Beaconburger instead of eating at home, where mac and cheese is a dollar a box.”
“Let go of my son,” his mom said in a low, deadly voice. Then, very softly, “Scott, do you need your inhaler?”
Scott pursed his lips together. He was trying to push the air down his windpipe into his lungs. Each puff of the inhaler cost money. His dad always said so. He didn’t want his dad to get madder. Scott didn’t want him to yell at his mom because Scott had asthma. It wasn’t her fault. It was his, Scott’s.
“Hold on, Scott,” she said, reaching back into her purse. “I’ve got it right here.”
“He doesn’t need that,” Scott’s father said. “It’s all in his head.”
Scott pushed harder, but it wasn’t working. He began to wheeze.
“Let go of him,” his mom said again. “Scott, here.” She held out the inhaler.
His father kept a painful grip on Scott’s wrist, grinding the bones together. Tears welled in Scott’s eyes as he gazed at his lifesaver—the inhaler. “You baby him. That’s why he thinks he’s so delicate. C’mon, Scott.” His dad jiggled his wrist. “Stop being such a wimp.”
There was no air in his lungs. body. He couldn’t get any. His mom’s eyes got big, and she turned the full force of her gaze on his dad.
“Let go of my son, now,” she said. “Let go of him or I swear to God, I will deck you.”
No, I’ll breathe, Scott promised her, promised them, if only to make it all stop. But he couldn’t. He was beginning to see yellow and gray dots.
His mom half rose out of her chair. Scott’s father made a show of releasing Scott, and Scott grabbed the inhaler from his mom and took a puff. His air passages opened and he sucked in air. He took another puff, even though each puff cost money, and shut his eyes as he trembled with relief.
“Yeah, he’s your son, all right,” Scott’s father said. “But maybe he’s not mine.”
Her eyes narrowed. She hated his dad. Anyone could see that.
“Scott, are you all right?” she asked him.
No, he wanted to tell her. I’m not. And I won’t be, ever. Not as long as he’s with us.
“We need to go home. He needs to rest,” she said.
His father grabbed his mom’s purse and yanked out her wallet. His hand shook as he handed Scott a five-dollar bill.
“Go play your damned video games,” he hissed at him. Scott took the money and stumbled away. Passing table after table, he heard some girl talking to some boy about being in love.
I will never fall in love, Scott vowed. Ever.
I don’t see what’s contrite about his hallucination involving Allison kissing another guy. Of course his fear involves his relationship. The boy clings to love like it’s his inhaler. Allison is his anchor. Is it naive? Maybe. But considering the kind of relationship his parents had, I don’t blame him for it.
Sorry, I just wanted to share this with you because I thought you’d be interested.
omg omg thank you for sharing this holy shit this is so - i don’t even know how to label this, jesus, it’s fucking gut wrenching this explains so much
and pls, no apologies needed! thank you so much for sharing this with me, because this, holy cow, this solidifies WHY i love scott so much, more so than any other protagonist in any work of fiction i love
like
omg
actual tears <333
FUCK ALL Y’ALL SCOTT HATERS HE IS THE BEST MY BB <3
(Source: jellyfishverse, via foxglovesandaconite)
thirtyspells answered your question: okay so i’m at an impasse with my Sabriel fic aka…
Scott and Isaac in a confined space. Isaac does not react well and Scott tries his best to soothe him. Bonus for Scott/Isaac vibes :)
